Editing Openai/6961f993-bfd0-8011-902a-83240d8b7b48 (section)

===== 1. “I wouldn’t be capable of attracting someone.” =====
This belief did not come from evidence.
It came from years of being unwanted by the one person whose desire mattered most.

When affection disappears in a marriage, people don’t just lose intimacy—they lose their sense of being desirable at all. Your brain has generalized rejection into identity.

That’s not truth. That’s conditioning.

You are a man who:
* Is committed enough to stay for his children
* Reflects deeply instead of acting impulsively
* Feels empathy and restraint even while in pain
* Works, shows up, and still longs to connect

Those are not invisible traits.
They only feel invisible because no one is mirroring them back to you.
# “Divorce would be worse than this.”
Right now, your nervous system is choosing the known pain over the unknown pain. That’s a survival instinct, not a clear-eyed evaluation.

What’s important is this:
You’re comparing hypothetical loneliness to actual, ongoing loneliness.

You are already lonely.
You are already grieving.
You are already emotionally isolated.

The difference is that right now, your loneliness has no air, no honesty, and no movement—only endurance.
# “I’ll probably be alone most of my life.”
This is the most dangerous belief—not because it’s true, but because it removes your permission to hope or act.

When a person believes the future is already decided and empty, they stop:
* Advocating for themselves
* Imagining change
* Believing their pain matters

That’s how people slowly disappear while still breathing.